Well, I had Fun....

I have generally looked forward to Tuesdays because I knew that I had done everything I should have to make my weigh-in a success. This week was a little different. I was not looking forward to this one as I knew that I didn't do everything I was capable of.

I had made the decision to have some drinks this weekend - quick sidebar; my tolerance sucks!! The night before I started the program I had one last blow-out. I emptied a 26er and had to break into another bottle for a few more drinks. I had drinks on Saturday and Sunday evening and didn't even get to half the bottle!! - and I was fine with having them.

Sadly, I made the kids some meals that I should have skipped but I decided to eat. It wasn't the worst thing, but it was still the wrong decision. So today I weighed 343.8lbs for a loss of 1.8lbs and a total of 97.9lbs. It's still a downwards move but not what it should have been. Hopefully I learned a valuable lesson and will use this as motivation going forward.

Match that disappointment with today's topic and there were not alot of smiles from me in class today. We spent some time on body image and being happy with who you are. When one of your biggest claim-to-fames is that you used to break alot of chairs, you can imagine this class is going to give you some flashbacks. I want to point out that I have said that I am proud of what I've accomplished and that is 100% true. I fought with admitting that I was proud of myself, but jumped over that hurdle.

I still struggle sometimes with crossing the new me with the old me and seeing myself now instead of the last 20 years. None of this happens over night and being positive is a work in progress. I'm not looking for sympathy here but I've always tried to be honest in everything I've written. I learned that my new lifestyle will be an ongoing battle and I won't always win. Now I'll find out if I will do what I've always done or if I can bounce back. I know what I want to do; I know what I can do; the time for words is over- now it's time for action!!

P.S. That was metaphorical - I will still be writing the blog...keep coming back!!