One-in-a-Row

Back to the grind, which means back to Tuesday classes at the Bariatric Clinic. They were closed last week and I didn't make it down there the week before, so it's been awhile since I was there. Before waking up today, I really feared going in, and in fact was going to skip. During the holidays I did my best Viking impersonation and ate everything in site. My new favourite was a caramel dip for apples which could also be called Poison in a Tupperware container. Cream cheese, caramel and Skor bars broken up because it wasn't fattening enough!!

When I woke up today, my plan was to go to my work appointment, then off to class. My appointment was canceled so in that moment I made the quick decision to head to the gym. I haven't been there in some time and was thankful that I remembered how to get there. I felt great after making what I felt was my first good choice in two weeks. A nice healthy breakfast and lunch and I was back on track.

On my way to the General, I went through the emotions that are involved in the realization that I was going on the scale and it would be awful. I was sure with my myriad of bad choices that I had gained at least six lbs. When I showed up our nutritionist Vanessa was waiting for us in the hall. She asked me how I did and I let loose with some serious verbal diarrhea. She stopped me before my head exploded and said let's hit the scale.

Off she went to get my chart, so I waited for her in our weigh-in room. I was anxious, but not to the point where I hated myself. When Vanessa came in I was ready to take my medicine, and on the scale I went. As the numbers starting appearing, I could barely look at it. Finally, after what felt like 15 minutes, I looked and saw the results....I lost a 1/2 lb.

Vanessa laughed at me..laughed!!! We sat down and she again asked me about my last couple of weeks. As it turns out I had used some of the things I was taught, some of the time. I have talked a lot about how my mindset has changed in the last four months, but I also realized how far I still have to go. I concentrated so much on my failures, that I never stopped to recognize my successes. While I'm that thrilled about some of the food choices - Poison in a Tupperware container not withstanding!! - I know that I made enough good ones to maintain my before Christmas weight, and that makes me happy....ish!!